The Softer Side For Romance
Yep I know, now you're blown away. You've got to be kidding. That tough love author you've learned to love (or hate) relating to serious lessons and coaching about business and challenges in the workplace, also writes about Romance?
Welcome to "The Softer Side" of Tom (TJ) Jones.
Sometimes, I just sit outside with a good cigar, a glass of wine (or a good smooth single barrel whiskey - don't you dare put anything with it in that glasss), and write what is on my mind about ways to treat, seduce, and love a woman with honor and respect. I've gone through the same changes in life that any man experiences from young adult hormones (which I had back in the day, but hell, I didn't know what to do with them and was basically a putz about romance. Ask Martha, my first love (who never noticed or really probably if the truth was told, didn't want to notice because.... well, I was just a putz in all my school years.
And as I grew older, it got worse. Because we "men" then go through stages like "rough is better - more manly they say", I'm not saying I went though these stages, because I've been a putz all my life when it came to romance. I can prove it after 3 marriages. It would seem like I'd start out OK I think with romance, but as time passed, the spark would recede. The lustful desires for each other (I mean both the man and the woman, not just one of them), drifted into obscurity because other things in life like money, careers, family, etc. etc. etc, sorta took over the intimate desires once held by both and then it was "damn the torpedo" and to hell with romance, we've got other more powerful imfluences that are much more important.
So now that I'm retired from the "clock in and out" world of being managed by "the man" and divorced after 32 years to my last wife who today is still a wonderful woman and we are the best of friends, I began looking over my 65 years of life on this amazing world, and reflecting on the "what a, should a, could a" paradigm. So as long as I'm still kicking, writing and lying (for fun of course) I'm going to reflect on my life and those lives of other men and try to START ANEW.
So to all those beautiful women I've met, loved, dated and some I married, here's my sincere apology that I wasn't a wiser man about what you needed, and what I did not know or understood. So here is my way to help other men, regardless of age, to learn some things about the "Essence of Romance" so you don't have to say something like "Damn, if I only knew" and so you won't be saying at 65 like me, that it would have been different if I "what a, should a, could a" done things differently in my earlier days.
Good luck on your walk to find "The Essence of Romance", a mans perspective.
First things First - The Basics
The women of the world, are gifts from God provided just for us ugly guys, to admire, love as a princess, to be treated with tender and caring attention and above all, to whisper in their sensitive ears, your true beliefs as to why you want to be with her by sharing your thoughts about her body, her mind and her heart.
Sorry libbers (if I spelled that right), I believe woman can have and richly deserve a very successful business and personal life without having to lose their femininity along the way. And their openness to let a MAN treat her as a WOMAN, rather than "equal creatures". A WOMAN was created (oops, maybe another bad word for libbers or scientists) as a WOMAN to be loved sensually, to bear children (which usually involves sexual contact with a MAN). Why must there be a rule that a woman must be the same as a man when it comes to life? Damn girls, what the heck is wrong with you. Let your hair down (or put it up, I don't care) and just let a man be a man, and a woman be a woman.. If they let their head, heart and soul rule their life, the will automatically be able to avoid those "abuses" that the libbers seem to think men are always doing to them. Hell, if a man does that, ladies kick him in the nuts and move on. You don't need to sue anyone, just one swift kick right there where it hurts, and you're finished. He moves on groaning and you move on with a big smile on your face. That's part of the "head" thing I teach.
OK, ranting over.....
Guys, pay attention... treat a woman (your wife or your lover to be), with sensual love using your head, heart and soul all at the same time. And yes, you're welcome to use my suggestions, but please, don't "copy paste". Just learn the essence of romance as you read what I write. If something inspires you, run with it but use your own words and senses. If you engage your head, heart and soul at the same time, it will flow beautifully. If you're not sure how to use your head, heart and soul at the same time, then you won't know about the essence of romance.
Some people just do not know how to engage all three of these wonderful features that God gave us to live life and to guide our every thought regardless of the situation. Except when at war in a foreign country. You'll be trained on a totally different method there.
So If you're one of those,that just can't "get it" about that head, heart and soul thing, just let me know and I'll explain how you do it.
Follow "The Softer Side" on Facebook.